17 Ways to Make Sex More Festive This Holiday Season

To say that 2020 has been a Shit Year is a bit of an understatement. Many of you have had to cancel plans, weddings, birthday parties, and even the holidays—which is, like, so depressing during a time like this.

But unfortunately, no matter how much you want to bake some frosted-sugar cooks with your gram rn, it looks like the country will be forced to ride out the end of this year stuck inside, lonely, in shoebox apartments, with the same person you’ve been quarantining with since March. (2020 really out here testing relationships, lol.)

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There’s good news, though: Just because you can’t really leave the house rn doesn’t mean your holiday has to be any less festive. While you can’t exactly go ice-skating or hit up a holiday pop-up bar, you can do some kinky Christmas shit with your S.O.

So below, find some, uh, “holiday cheer” and try out these fun, festive tips on your partner. I don’t know for sure, but methinks Santa would be proud.

1. Decorate an ornament like a penis. NSFW ornaments are a must during the Christmas season.
2. Dress up as a Christmas tree. Who doesn’t wanna get poked with pine needles while they’re going to third base?
3. Dress up as a snowman. Pretend to melt when things start *heating up* for bonus points.
4. Add “Jingle Bells” to your sex playlist. It’s got a great beat to hump along to.
5. Candy cane lube. It’s like regular lube, but minty—and makes blowjobs actually tasty.
6. Netflix and chill. (That’s when you make out during A Christmas Prince with the heat off.)
7. Decorate a gingerbread house. Feel free to get creative (and kinky) with the frosting.
8. Tie each other up with garland. Fuzzy handcuffs are out; Prickly ones are in.
9. Bring in a fruitcake to lick off of each other. Everyone hates them, so it’s not like they’ll be missed.
10. Instead of your usual dirty talk, recite the lyrics to “O’ Holy Night.
11. It seems obvious, but get Santa in there. If you’ve been wanting to role-play as Santa, now’s your chance.
12. Paint each other’s naked bodies festive holiday colors. You’re not going outside anytime soon anyway.
13. For those that celebrate Hanukkah, eight nights means eight different positions to try. And yes, they can all be variations of missionary.
14. Decorate the tree with sex toys. Get rid of those old snowman ornaments and hang up your vibrator instead. Frosty won’t turn you on like the Womanizer will.
15. Dress up your partner as a reindeer. Get to ridin’ your red-nose deer.
16. Try doing it in snowsuits. Now you can be warm and horny.
17. And last but not least, wrap each other in your favorite wrapping paper. A present you don’t need to wait till Christmas to open.

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Sex & Relationships – Cosmopolitan
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