Love , Sex and Relationships
Here’s Exactly How to Use the 7 Most Popular Types of Vibrators Out There
Nov
Considering how many different types of vibrators are out there (clitoral, internal, suction, anal, nipple, etc), it’s understandable if you’re a bit “where do I start” with the whole thing. The good news: there’s really no wrong way to use a vibrator as long as it’s safe (don’t go bringing a plug-in Magic Wand into the tub here for obvious reasons) and feels pleasurable to you.
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After all, that’s the whole point of vibrators anyways: to provide pleasure. Once you get the hang of one toy, you pretty much know how to use them all (pro-tip from someone who unboxes and susses out these toys for a living: holding the biggest power button down for two or more seconds will usually get you in business). Plus, instruction manuals are your friend! Don’t be intimidated by them — even though they’re booklet-sized things sometimes, you’ll likely find that it’s really just like two pages laying out which buttons do what in terms of intensity and pattern, and the other 99% of the instructions are the same thing in other languages. If you don’t feel like even conceptualizing opening the instructions (understandable), you can probs figure it out with a lil’ trial and error. Many designers create simple and easy-to-understand models that don’t even need instructions.
And while vibrators might have their specialties for suggested use, you can also always get creative with how you use them. The marketing copy on the box isn’t prescriptive and you can totally experiment. As Megan Stubbs, EdD, and sexologist, previously suggested to Cosmo, you can turn a wand-style vibrator into a rideable toy with a lil ingenuity and some help from a few pillows. Or turn any non-app enabled vibrator into a long-distance friendly one just by scheduling and doing a play-by-play with your partner over text or FaceTime.
Basically, the options are endless. That being said, if you’re looking for a basic, general guide to how to use specific kinds of vibrators, we consulted some experts in the industry to explain exactly how, why, and what to look forward to with some of the most common sex toy designs you’ll find.
The Wand Massager
This is kind of like the OG sex toy that you’re probably already familiar with if you watch porn. And though its exterior might look rather intimidating, trust that this sex toy is a fan-favorite for a reason. “The wand massager is a classic, unisex device that doubles as a body massager and self pleasure device,” says certified sexologist and pleasure coach Tyomi Morgan. “The wand is ergonomically designed to curve around the body, and is either rechargeable or runs on outlet power.”
How to Use
You can choose to either lie down with your knees in butterfly position, or on all fours reaching back toward the clitoris, suggests Morgan. “They can be used to massage on and around genitals for arousal,” but if you want to build some foreplay into the mix, they can “also be used to help relax the muscles of any part of the body from tense shoulders to sore feet,” she adds.
Pro Tip
Wand massagers should be used with water-based lube (yes, it’s important to use lube—even when you’re masturbating!) to protect its silicone material, advises Morgan. “Just remember to give the device a rest every 15 minutes to prevent burnout.”
Remote Control Vibrators + Wearables
These bbs are… well, pretty much exactly what they sound like: remote-control operated vibrators. The variation of pulses, vibrations, and speeds are controlled typically via a downloadable app on a phone or smart device—and in some cases, remotes. These can help people couples ~play~ together from a distance (ahem, all of you in long distance relationshipers). Vibrating panties would also fall under this category.
How to Use
“The bulbous end inserts into the vagina, while the neck sits between the lips hugging the device in place to end at the head of the clitoris,” says Morgan. They can be worn whether you’re at home cooking dinner or if you want to be discrete by pairing one in your underwear while you go out to dinner.
Pro Tip
If you have a thing for BDSM, try using these vibrators in a kinky dom/sub role play, suggests Morgan. “The dom holds the controls, and the sub wears the device, awaiting for the dom to control her arousal and orgasmic peak.”
Anal Plug Vibrators
When you think of vibrators, you might automatically associate them with your clitoris (or surrounding areas) since that is typically where most women receive pleasure. But “butt stuff has been adopted as a viable and enjoyable sexual experience for more straight women in the last decade,” says Morgan. “When it comes to vibrations, butts are definitely not off limits.”
How to Use
Insert the flared base gently by using water-based lube or silicone-based lube (just not with toys made of silicone!). If the pressure is too much, start with your fingers and build up to the toy. “The flared base ensures it stays in place comfortably, and the spirals on its neck makes removal easy after extended play,” confirms Morgan. Try this in whatever position is most comfortable to you: on all fours, on your back, in the shower, etc.
Pro Tip
“Use antibacterial toy cleaner or soap after play,” says Morgan, and remember: Do. Not. Double. Dip. What goes in the anal area should not be put anywhere vaginally, or else you could be at risk for UTIs or other annoying vaginal pains like yeast infections and bacterial vaginosis.
Bullet Vibrators
Presenting: The classic, starter vibrator. It is small and bullet-shaped and can fit discreetly pretty much anywhere. “Bullet vibrators provide a focused vibration in one specific area, so think about where you want to experience that sensation,” suggests sexual wellness educator Elise Schuster, founder of Okayso, a free app that connects anyone with questions about sex to experts.
How to Use
Using your hand, place the bullet vibrator somewhere externally—your clitoris, nipples, or anal opening, suggests Schuster. “Start out with a light pressure and listen to your body. If you feel like you need more, increase the pressure.”
Pro Tip
If you’re coupled up, try using it with your boo. “These can be attached to special cock rings during partnered sex so that it stimulates the clitoris and vulva during penetration,” says sexuality coach Jennifer Doan.
Suction Vibrators
These vibrations simulate a sensation of pulling and sucking—similar to how it may feel when someone goes down on you. “Suction vibrators can be really fun, but it’s all about getting it in the right position,” says Schuster. “You may need to play around with it a bit before you find the sweet spot.”
How to Use
Place the hollowed hole attached to it directly over the clitoris, says Doan. The suction cup stimulates the area on and around the clitoris, so the toy doesn’t require a ton of pressure. Adjust the vibration level and intensity to your liking as you continue to play around with it. “You may find that you only need to hover the toy in place to get the desired effect,” says Doan.
Pro Tip
Use the autopilot mode. “You can benefit from the heightened pleasure of unpredictability, but you also don’t have to think about adjusting it manually. It also uses smart technology so that the pleasure air doesn’t begin until you press it against your skin,” says Jess O’Reilly, PhD, resident sexologist for Astroglide.
Dual Massaging Vibrators
A dual-pronged, or “rabbit style” vibrator has two ends: one that inserts into the vagina and one that sits externally on top of the clitoris. “Typically, the shorter end stays outside the body, and the longer end sits inside,” says Doan.
How to Use
Generally, these toys work the magic themselves. Once you’ve positioned each part (longer end inside of you, shorter end on your clitoris or vulva), set the speed and intensity you like, then hold it in your hand or try rocking and rotating it, says Schuster.
Pro Tip
Lube can (and will!) totally enhance this experience for you—just as it would if you were having regular P-in-V sex. But if the pressure is too much for you, stick to one type of pressure instead of internal and external pressure simultaneously, says O’Reilly.
Internal Vibrators
There’s a squishy, ridged area on the front wall of your vagina that can feel really good when touched, and an internal vibrator was created specifically to stimulate that area, says Doan. These toys are typically curved, have a long handle, and vibrate at the tip, not the base.
How to Use
Insert the vibrator inside you and make sure the curved part is angled toward the belly button. “You can rock it, twist it, slide it in and out, or whatever feels good,” says Schuster.
Pro Tip
“This kind of stimulation can feel like a large amount of pressure building up inside you and the pressing need to urinate. If you relax into those feelings, both orgasm and squirting is a possibility,” says Doan.
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Sex & Relationships – Cosmopolitan
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